An Update and a Meltdown

I did pretty well at work considering the news we received this morning. I figured I'd be a mess. It was stressful and the day felt long - as the hours dragged on I grew tired and restless. I wanted to be home, safe and alone.

I sit here now listening to music and trying to find the right words to express the fear, confusion, and sadness that has crept into my mind. A good friend recently made a musical recommendation - The Decemberists. I'm listening to it now and I can feel the tears develop in my eyes. Is it the music? Is it what happened this morning? If I wasn't alone right now would I still feel this way?

I hate everything that is happening (and now the tears are falling). I need to come back to this post later...